Happy New Year!!!!

New Year's Eve is always a day of reflection for me; the most bittersweet of all holidays. After 16 years of struggling with MS, my mother passed away on New Year's Eve when I was living in Arizona. Obviously, that is the "bitter". Since I always battled with my sadness and guilt on this holiday, Ted made the wonderful decision to ask me to be his wife a minute before midnight on New Year's Eve. Thus, the much needed "sweet". So, today I remember my mother and feel the sting of her absence while celebrating my marriage.

This year, I feel sad that my mom didn't get the opportunity to meet Max or enjoy being a grandmother. I know she would have loved him. But, it is hard to be sad with Max here showering me with smiles and laughter. He's been especially cuddly this afternoon with me; he must know that I need it.

The Great Foot Discovery

Max discovered his feet today, and now he can't stop himself from jamming them into his mouth. Of course, I had to take photos of him during this newest "phase".....

Mommy's Letter to Baby

I have started a new tradition on Christmas Eve. I decided that, since Max will not have any memories of these early Christmases, I will write him a letter every Christmas Eve for him to read when he gets older. It will give him a nice little insight into his world as a baby. Here's this year's letter:


Christmas Eve, 2008


Dear Max,


Daddy and I just put you to bed a few hours ago, and you seem to be sleeping well in your crib. I have been tempted to go check on you quite a few times, but every now and again I hear you “coo” or sigh, which gives me the reassurance that I need that you are ok and don’t require the interruption of me creeping into your room and placing my hand on your chest to feel it move up and down with your breath.

This has been the most amazing year, filled with inconceivable joys for Daddy and I. Last year at this time I was newly pregnant with you and was still wrapping my thoughts around the fact that there was a precious life growing inside my belly. This year, I am counting my blessings that you are healthy, happy, and such a good little boy. Daddy and I say to each other nearly every day how very lucky we are to have you. You were the most wonderful surprise we could imagine.

You aren’t aware of what Christmas or any holiday is yet, but soon enough you will be. This holiday, more then any other in my opinion, celebrates family and has some very important (and fun!) traditions that you will become familiar with as you grow up. More important then the presents, stockings, visits from Santa, and great food and sweets, are the laughs shared, hugs exchanged and the warmth from the love of family and friends that will encompass you. You are already so loved by so many wonderful people; you are a fortunate little boy.

Today I picked you up at daycare at noon and the joy of the holiday was apparent. The two women who take care of you every day, Miss Melanie and Miss Ann loved your reindeer sweater and your dress pants, and Miss Ann gave you some beautiful gifts that I will keep with this letter in your “Keepsake Box” that I have started for you. They both love you very much, and I expressed to them today how much Daddy and I appreciate them and the affection they shower you with daily. We are all lucky to have them.

When we came home, we napped until Daddy came home, and then he and I put you in some Christmas pajamas. You are so adorable in everything, but due to my love of pj’s, I think you are particularly cute in your bedtime clothes. We spent some time playing with you, and I am just amazed at how much and quickly you are learning. You are just starting to pick up small items by yourself, and it seems as though you will be able to sit up on your own in a matter of days. Every achievement is huge here; Daddy and I clap and yell “Yeah for the baby!” over and over day in and day out. You just seem so smart and you’re funny, too; you never run out of smiles and laughter. Daddy has a knack for making you giggle like no one else; I love watching the two of you together.

Before your birth this past July, Daddy and I had the tradition of spending Christmas Eve alone together; just the two of us. We would relax and have a huge dinner and talk about our life together. Tonight, it was just the three of us, and the tradition continued: we had a huge dinner while you slept soundly on the couch and we talked about our life together….with you. Our beautiful boy.

Tomorrow will be a wonderful day. We will go over to Pa and Nana’s house, and Aunt Cheryl, Uncle Mike and your cousins Julia, Olivia and Jack will be there. After an early dinner there, we will travel to Grandma and Grandpa’s house. Aunt Kathleen, Uncle Eric and Aunt Laurin and your cousins Nick, David, Sean and Adam will also be there. It will be a busy day, but you will be squeezed and held and loved SO much that none of us will mind being tired.

I hope you enjoy your first Christmas, Max. I love you and Daddy more then anything in the world and can't imagine my life without both of you in it. None of us will ever know what you are dreaming about right now in your crib, but I hope you are having visions of sugarplums. I just heard you “coo” so I know you are safe and well, although I might creep up and check on you anyway…..

Love,
Mommy

Ready for Santa's Arrival

According to Norad (http://www.noradsanta.org/en/home.html) Santa is in Grytviken, South Georgia and the South Sandwich Islands right now, and Max is eagerly awaiting his arrival. Below is a photo of Max's first note to the Big Guy in Red.

Looking Forward to Max's First Christmas

I am really excited about this Christmas. As usual, Ted and I are staying home and having a huge dinner and opening our gifts to eachother, which is always wonderful. This year we have the added joy of putting milk and cookies out for Santa, giving Max a bath so he is nice and clean for Christmas Day, and looking towards the next day with our baby boy. I'm sure he will have a blast on his first Christmas. Merry Christmas, everyone.