Uh oh. This Sucks....

Max discovered his thumb tonight. I was getting him ready for bed, and had to grab a cloth from the bottom of the changing table. As my head was down, I could tell he was up to something: I could hear him cooing and "ah-goo"ing. When I looked back up at him, his thumb was firmly planted in his mouth. It was adorable, and he was clearly very pleased with himself since he was smiling from ear to ear. Now, since I've become a mom, I read pretty much everything I can get my hands on, and I think I've even done too much research. So, what "sucks" is the prospect of having to break Max of a thumb sucking habit, which I've read can be quite the challenge. Add that to my list of things that keep me up at night. Anyway, for the rest of the night he continued to try to get that thumb in his mouth. Here are some photos of one of the failed attempts.

I Get to Go Home Today!

I went to bed nice and early last night and now here I am, up at 530am Pacific time. I think I'm excited to go home! In a little while I'll shower, pack my things and head down to the conference for another stunning continental breakfast. Actually, yesterday they offered some chocolate coissants that were really delicious; they weren't on the same level as the pain au chocolat that we had in Paris, obviously, but tasty none-the-less. So, I'll eat some breakfast, do a little last minute schmoozing and head to the airport around noon. I'm anxious to get home and hold my little boy. Ted's been great about sending me multiple photos every day, but later tonight I get to smell his head and tickle those little toes. I can't wait!!!

Dreams....

Last night my mother met Max in a dream I had. Usually when I dream of her, she is healthy and active, so this dream was unusual for me in that she was clearly sick: she was unable to speak and was in her wheelchair.



I'm not sure about all the details, but I do remember that she was in a big, open, sunny, very nicely decorated living room sitting in her chair, looking very sad and lonely. I walked in holding Max and she slowly lifted her head and smiled. I brought him over to her and placed him in her lap, and grandmother and grandson's eyes met and exchanged smiles. Maybe this was her way of telling me that I'm doing an ok job raising him so far, or maybe she was just telling me that she's here with me, Ted and Max. Maybe it was just a dream that I hadn't had yet because I haven't slept very soundly since I had him. Whatever the meaning behind this, I woke up this morning feeling her close by. I cried a little, and now feel refreshed. I'm glad they "met".

Missing My Boys....

I had to leave my boys today and I miss them. A lot.

I am at a conference in San Diego for work; I left the house at 4am today and won't get back until Sunday morning at 1am or so. Early this morning before I left I crept into Max's room and kissed his little chubby cheeks, told him I loved him, and dragged myself out of the room and out of the house. I should mention that it wasn't easy to say goodbye to Ted, either.

It isn't that I don't think that Ted can handle things at home, mind you. I know that Max will have a great time with his Dad. Maybe I'm afraid that they won't miss me as much as I miss them. I am really trying to look at this positively, and I know that I need to be here for the good of my career, but it is difficult.

I have insisted that Ted send me a photo every day, and here's today's.....

Photo Op!!!

Life with Max creates a lot of photo ops, so I figure that I have two choices: hire a professional photographer to follow us around all the time, or have my camera around my neck 24 / 7.

Today when I picked Max up from "school" he was his usual smiley self. We listened to a Sirius Satellite Radio station geared towards kids, and as the cast from Disney's "Beauty and the Beast" sang "Be Our Guest" I could hear Max cooing and even giggling a little. It was a good day, apparantly. We got home and I brought him up to his room to change his diaper and put him into his pj's a little early. Once he was set, it was my turn. I grabbed his monkey blanket and put him on our bed and went to take my contacts out. When I turned around to make sure he was ok, he was clutching the blanket and smiling away. He just looked so darn cute, that I couldn't resist running downstairs and grabbing the camera to take a few (read: 40) photos.

Here are the best of the bunch....

Our Night So Far....

Well, it's been interesting. We had a great night with him; he smiled and cooed all through dinner. He was honestly an angel. He was falling asleep in his Boppy downstairs, so I decided to take him upstairs, put him in his pj's, give him a nice big bottle and put him into the crib. It went really, really well. He smiled through his diaper change and was his usual helpful self as I put him in his Ralph Lauren pajamas: keeping his hand in a fist, straightening his arms and legs when I needed him to. Then he had about 3 ounces of formula and fell asleep in my arms. I kissed his noggin, wished him "sweet dreams", lowered him carefully into his crib and went downstairs. About 5 minutes later, Ted and I heard him moving around and then.....THE LOUDEST, MOST HIGH-PITCHED SHREIKS came out of that room. It was scary. Ted and I looked at eachother in horror, and then without a word we ran upstairs, clearing two steps at a time. Ted scooped him up, put his tear stained face on his shoulder and starting the soothing process. About 15 seconds into this, Max burped. Yep. He had gas. All that yelling over some gas. You gotta love kids.....

Growing Up So Fast!

I recently made the decision to start giving Max a little bit of rice cereal. I had done a ton of research about it, and although most of what I read said that you should wait until the baby is about 4 months old, I also found out that as long as you don't put the cereal in the bottle directly and keep the cereal really runny, it should be fine. So, why am I so anxious to give him cereal? Well, he just seems ready, I guess. I've given him little teeny tiny tastes of food here and there and he has responded very well, and his only real fussy time of the day is when Ted and I are eating dinner unless we include him and have him sit with us. So, it seemed like a good time to try something new with Max.

Daycare has been helping me introduce the cereal, and today I made it a little thicker then usual to see how he would do. See for yourself....

Say "Hello" to the Doctor, Max....

Today around 3pm the Director of the daycare called me at work and said that Max wasn't feeling well. She said that he had some nasty stuff in his diapers and he projectile vomited. So, of course I dropped everything and ran right over to pick him up. When I got there, Max was sound asleep in his crib. Everyone was very concerned about him, and said he had just fallen asleep, so I carefully picked him up as Miss Ann filled me in on what was up. Max and Miss Ann have a very special friendship; she always makes sure that he gets some fresh air every day, and he thanks her by showering her with huge smiles. So, when she said that he wasn't acting like himself, I knew something had to be wrong.

Max was out like a light and didn't stir at all when I put him in his car seat. He didn't make a peep on the car ride home, and I didn't see the blue of his eyes until we got home. When I went to take him out of his car seat, he gave me a huge smile and I was starting to think that he was fine and maybe is a big faker. I had already called the doctor and set up an appointment for 430pm, so I changed Max's clothes and off we went. I paid the co-pay and we were seen right away.

The nurse told me to get Max undressed and she weighed him and took his temperature. Here's the amazing thing....Max was 16 POUNDS, 10 OUNCES. Seriously, he's a big kid. His temp was fine, and in a few minutes the doc came in to check my boy. As he was looking into Max's eyes with the light, Max was smiling at him, so he said, "Hello, Max. Nice to meet you". That's when Max farted and laughed. It was hysterical. I was cracking up and the doctor thought it was "super". He said that it was the best thing that happened to him all day.

Anyway, once the odd introductions were over and he was done examining Max, he said that he was fine and, "dare I say....perfect". He was a little fussy at home tonight, but now he is sleeping soundly in his crib so all is well with my little boy's world again. Until the next time.....

Laughter is All Around...

Max likes to be involved when Ted and I are cooking or eating, so I usually put him in his bouncy seat on the counter and he smiles and coos at us as we mill about. We can't resist taking the time to smile back or wipe the inevitable drool off his face with his favorite "burpy". Tonight, something extraodinary happened. I was sitting at the island filling out forms that are due for an appointment tomorrow, and Ted was talking to Max and making him smile. All of a sudden, Max laughed. A big, hearty, "I'm so happy!" laugh. It was remarkable and just the sweetest sound! Tears welled up in my eyes as Ted and I hugged eachother in celebration of this major milestone. Now if I could only get him to say, "Mama"......

The Arrival of Max

I think it is only appropriate to make my first real post on this blog about Max's arrival. For those of you who already know the story, you can skip this posting and move onto the next one!

A lot of things were going on this past summer that were making me more then a little stressed. The travel agency I work for changed ownership, and my new bosses took the revenue from my department into heavy consideration when they decided to purchase Bokoff Kaplan Travel. So, I knew that I had to do well for them to keep them impressed. Easier said then done when you are just about to have your first baby and your co-worker's second child is due to arrive 2 weeks after! But, I vowed that I would do my best, and that's exactly what I did. With that in mind, I decided to work as long as I possibly could up until Max was born.

My original due date was the 22nd of July, but due to the gestational diabetes I wound up with, the doctors decided to induce me on the 15th of July. With this date in mind, I decided that my last day in the office would be Saturday, July 12th, but on the 10th I was just exhausted and, well, fat, so I left the office around 1pm and resigned myself to the fact that I would not be back in. I had a doctor's appointment the morning before and they really weren't happy about me working anymore and seriously suggested that I stay home until they induced me, anyway, so I figured that I would follow doctor's orders and try to relax a little.

I was so ready for Max to arrive, and I told Ted that we should do everything possible to get him out. So, I added a little crushed red pepper to my Boboli pizza we had for dinner, and Ted and I went for a short walk after we finished up. When we arrived back home, I got to the top of the stairs and felt a small push of liquid come out and the thought crossed my mind that my water may have broken. But, it really wasn't much, so I dismissed it, and spent some time relaxing on the couch with Ted before he had to go to bed. He had to be asleep early to cover the early morning shift for work, and I guess I had a feeling that something was up, so around 8pm I told him to get to bed just in case we had to head to the hospital. Sure enough, around 830 I got up from the couch and felt a much larger gush of water come out so I called the doctor, explained what was going on, and was told to head to the hospital so they could check to see if my water broke.

During the drive to the hospital which takes all of 5 minutes, my heart was racing. I knew deep down that this was it, and I would be seeing my boy soon. I wasn't in any pain, but as I waddled to the birthing center, I was feeling water come out in small pushes, and the baby seemed settled, like he was resting up before making his debut. The emotions were wonderful; I didn't know what to expect and I was scared but so excited and happy that I felt like I could jump out of my skin.

Sure enough, the doctor found that my water broke, and they got me set up in the hospital room with my gown and the fetal monitor and IV saline drip and I was settled in by 10pm. Ted went to get my bag from the car and call his parents, I called my Dad and texted some friends, and then I rested and waited for the contractions to come. And boy, did they come.....

Me, resting thanks to drugs.....

I wish I could tell you exactly what contractions felt like to me, but I just can't remember, other then they hurt. Bad. For the record, they do NOT feel like menstrual cramps "magnified". I had some kind of pain med given to me around 1 or 2 am, and then the epidural around 430am. The epidural did NOT hurt as much as I thought it would, quite honestly. After it was in, I told the anesthetiologist that he was my new best friend. I wasn't kidding!!!!! Thanks to the drugs, I slept a lot, and around 10 am I was ready to start pushing. I pushed and pushed for 2 hours before they realized that due to the epidural, I wasn't getting far enough along with getting the baby out. They sent Ted to go get lunch (hey....no fair!!!!!) and they "turned down" my epidural. Let's be serious here....they turned OFF that epidural!!!!! That's when the real pain started.

My siatic nerve was killing me, so the midwife Tyann suggested that I get on my hands and knees on the bed, which I did. Let me tell you something....you have NO shame after you've had your bare ass sticking up in the air while strangers are walking in and out of the room and you're trying to push a baby out of you.....

Ted got back from his lunch (he seemed annoyed and a little nervous that they had sent him away; it seemed as though he would have been happier staying with me) and they had me start pushing again. Ted was awesome; the best coach a girl could have. He was holding one of my legs and counting down each push evenly and calmly and he was so encouraging and loving that I really feel lucky to have him as a husband.

After a while, the midwife and nurse started practically yelling that they could see Max's head and it was full of the blondest blond hair. We had a mirror set up at the end of the bed so Ted and I could watch the delivery, and I couldn't see anything yet so I was getting frustrated. When I could finally see his head, the pain seriously kicked in and I wanted him out of me. I said to Ted, "I can't do it. Just tell them to get him out! Tell them to do whatever they have to do, but get him out. I can't do it." Of course, no one took me seriously, and they encouraged me to keep going and to push through the pain. Finally, at 2:34Pm, Max Keenan Lorson was born at 7 pounds and 9 ounces and was measured at 21 1/4 inches. He was beautiful, and MY!!! All that blond hair really was amazing!!!!

My little "bun" fresh out of the "oven"....


Wow. I couldn't believe I was someone's mother. ME!!! It was amazing, and frightening and wonderful all at the same time. Max slept most of that day and Ted and I just sat and looked at him for hours. Some friends from work came to see Max, and of course his grandparents ran up to hold him and love him.








We slept and ate well that night (Ted went out to get me a Big Mac...yum!), and then the following day we had more visitors. Ted's sister Kathleen, more friends from work, and my best friend Karen and her family, and my dear friend Matt all came to wish us well. He was a lucky little boy to have all that attention and affection!!!





Karen and Michelle


Matt

TheresaSabrina

Kathleen

On Sunday, we put Max in his going-home outfit and took the 5-minute trip back to our place. He looked so tiny in his car seat and I was really worried about how the cats would react to the new addition. They didn't seem bothered at all, really, so all was well. For the first few days being home, he seemed to have day and night confused, so he would sleep all day and then be awake and a little cranky at night. That eventually wore off, and Max and I settled into a good, although frequent and sometimes frustrating, schedule. I felt the pressure of being his only source of nourishment a lot, but Ted was great at encouraging me and convincing me to stay strong and not give him formula yet. We eventually did, but I breast fed exclusively for a good 3 or 4 weeks, so I was happy.

Anyway, now my boy is three months old and doing well. From here on in, I will give updates often about him and his milestones, so check back in!!!

The first post to this site.....

Ok, Ok, I know. I was HORRIBLE at keeping up with my posts when I was pregnant with Max. But, hopefully I'll do better now. I sometimes felt as though I complained A LOT in my writings about the symptoms of pregnancy, giving the wrong impression about how I was dealing with it. I loved being pregnant. Seriously. Once I found out I had gestational diabetes, I started thinking that writing about the day to day would seem whiney and a bit too clinical, so I just lost my gumption to keep adding posts.

So, here I am: a new mom of a beautiful, healthy and happy little boy named Max Keenan Lorson. (If you don't already know about how this name was chosen, you can go to my "old" blog at www.sheilasbabyblog.blogspot.com and read the entry about that....) I plan on using this space on the internet to record the everyday joys, trials, tears, fears and milestones that are inevitably going to consume me now. I'll start with an entry about Max's arrival on the 11th of July, 2008......